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I've noticed that women in most 'careers' are seen as lazy. 'Lower class' women are always seen as lazy, even more so if they are mothers, more again if they are single mothers. Whether on benefits or working two full time jobs and raising a family on top (which is not an uncommon scenario, if you have doubts), if she hasnt achieved some mythical "right" career it is because she is lazy or stupid or both.
Yet women who earn packets in demanding careers are also seen as lazy. They are often assumed to have "slept their way" to the top, or to have got there through "daddys connections".
SaltyC wrote:What does "holding the woman accountable" entail, in practical terms? How would you do that?
For those of us who have gotten ourselves into bad situations, how did we get out?
For me, it was because someone outside of my situation never stopped communicating, no matter what. For this reason, I would not alienate women I have known who were involved in prostitution or stripping, I still see them as humans worthy of respect. They know my position, that what they are doing is wrong, but also that I don't think they are less than me because of it. They still are wonderful human beings with worthwile contributions to make, just this one aspect, this one thing they do is wrong but it does not define them.
It is important that we are united in respecting the humanity of women who are in abusive relationships, have eating disorders, are in prostitution, be friends with them, don't alienate them. We must prove the critics of radical feminism wrong when they say that we want to put women down. We don't want to put them down because the reason they are in that bad situation is that they have low self-esteem. You need a lot of self-worth to cultivate the guts to escape. Their pimps and husbands and johns do quite a job putting them down, more than anybody, more than all our criticisms ever could,
BUT for some reason, our criticisms are what they will get defensive about. Oh yeah, stockholm syndrome. Still, we should let them know we are waiting to help them when they are ready to get the hell out.
SaltyC wrote:Soopermouse, I am asking you this not as a challenge but out of ignorance,is an eating disorder not a choice? I think this question is a big mystery to a lot of people, I always assumed it was like an addiction.
vg1 wrote:luck has a ton to do with it soopermouse. there are thousands of women with backgrounds similar to yours who worked and sweated and tried and cried and not all of them will still be here. did they deserve less than you? did they work less than you? are you any better than the ones who didnt make it?
there is nothing wrong at all with being proud of your achievements, what is wrong is when you start judging people by what they appear to have achieved, or not.
and you don't know me either soopermouse, but you've made a helluva lot of presumptions about me. you write your history like i should be silenced by it but it isnt all that different to mine. perhaps you think we should have to fill out some sort of oppression checklist? i empathise with your background soopermouse but ive been through the mangle myself, and i think most of us here have.
im not shit because i didnt achieve what you have. you're not better than me. get over yourself.
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